Non-Negotiables: your tool for self-honouring

We all have non-negotiables. Whether they are conscious or serve our highest self is another matter.

We all have non-negotiables. - the activities and behaviours that are not open to discussion or modification. Whether they are conscious or serve our highest self is another matter.

Consciously crafted non-negotiables are themes that weave through every aspect of your life, inform your habits, anchor you in your needs and wants and move you towards your vision.

Committing to your non-negotiables allows you to work from your strengths and manage the external expectations that might otherwise derail you. They provide a framework to connect your vision to your daily activities. They keep you in your power, bring out the best in you and ultimately help you:

• Live a life that inspires you

• Set boundaries and say no

• Create space for your best work

• Honour your needs

• Take courageous action

Discovering, defining and crafting your non-negotiables allows you to embrace life and thrive on your terms.

How do they work?

Life has a natural ebb and flow, and as such you prioritise different activities at different times. Non-negotiables provide a framework to stay focused and on track with what you need at any given moment. They allow you to honour yourself and your needs first, and in so doing bring out the best in yourself for everyone around you.

In honouring your non-negotiables you will begin to set boundaries, and as you realise the benefits of your boundaries, maintaining them will become effortless, non-confrontational and the people around you will learn to honour themselves through your example!

Defining your non-negotiables requires that you get clear on your Season (read more about the seasons here), your vision and what brings you joy.

As your season changes and your vision evolves so too will the inputs needed to support your best work and your highest self. Non-negotiables form these inputs. For example, in a season of Strive - of high growth, progress, energy expenditure - non-negotiables that refuel and replenish, keep you energetic and creative, and motivate you to keep going are valuable. 

How are they different from habits?

While habits are without a doubt valuable, non-negotiables go beyond the routine of simple tasks. Non-negotiables form an overarching theme of activities that support the season, vision or goal. Non-negotiables allow flexibility at times when life goes into flux, and are not bound by the same rigidity as habits. 

Non-negotiables allow for interpretation and a cluster of activities that can be honoured daily to support the desired outcome.

How long do they last?

Some non-negotiables sit with people for years. A commitment to nourishing yourself on a daily basis, or to movement, for example, and while the supporting activities may vary or evolve, the non-negotiable remains. Typically these are core non-negotiables that support your vision or sense of joy. Others may only last a season - typically three months - before your focus and your needs change. 

In a season of Heal - a time of rest, recovery, and recuperation - non-negotiables providing connection, rest, and reflection are essential. And, as you move back into a season on Strive or Thrive, these non-negotiables no longer serve your goals in the same way.

How can I find mine?

Non-negotiables are at the core of the work that I do. You can hit the ground running today with Self Honour 101 - a free guide to defining your non-negotiable life. 

Or if you want more support and to take a deep dive into all things non-negotiable, book a Self Honour Consultation - a 90-minute session to work through the 5 steps to defining your non-negotiable life. I will coach you through the challenges and support you in defining your vision and season, as well as non-negotiables that will truly serve you. Plus with a 30 minute follow up you can try your non-negotiables on for size and learn how the process works, so you can continue to self-support as your seasons shift. 

Send me a message for more information and to book your consultation.

Next week I will share for my top tips on when it's time to revisit your non-negotiables. Check back in then or drop me an email on candice@candicefordocaching.com, and I’ll keep you posted!